This year has been incredibly challenging in the best ways, for me. I’ve gone through so much internally. I’ve changed so much; my whole life has changed. And yet so much has stayed the same. I find I’m challenged to acknowledge and honour my growth without beating myself up for not growing enough.
So I’m sitting here thinking of just how much hasn’t changed and acknowledging that I still have a long way to go but holding space for that to be ok. I don’t have to grow overnight; I can’t.
There are deep wounds and conditioning that will take a lot of time to heal, and instead of letting it overwhelm me, I’m going to embrace it.
It is terrifying, and that’s ok because it’s teaching me courage. It’s teaching me patience. It’s teaching me to trust my instincts, to take healthy risks, and to step into the unknown.
I had removed myself from life because I had no guidebook, no instructions on how to do things and how to get through it all. Not knowing what to do caused me to freeze up, to shut down, to retreat, to hide…
Well, no more.
I deserve better.
I don’t need a guidebook, for I am the author of my own story; I am the creator of my own life. If I don’t have the answers, that’s ok; its ok to mess up, to stumble, to fall, to fumble my way through until I figure it out.
And I will figure it out because I am capable; I have the capacity to learn. Things don’t happen to me; they happen for me!
And each stumble is a lesson on how to do it next time, on how to get back up.
No more hiding. I am here. I am stumbling, with grace. I am learning. I am growing. I am vulnerable. I am brave. I am ME.
Real Sister, Sharree
